May I make a suggestion?

My company has an online suggestion system that employees use to submit ideas in order to make the company a better place to work. Here’s a suggestion I found kinda funny. I actually can’t believe this person had the gonads to post this because the submissions aren’t anonymous, they’re free for the whole company to see. They must have just received their pink slip and decided to go out with a blaze of glory.

It would be nice to have little fountains with rocks throughout the office. Also paint the walls hunter green with white trim and have a earthtone plush carpet. It would be good also to get white wicker desks and branches throughout office with some live butterflies (like Cypress Gardens has) And a large lit aquarium with pretty big fish. The coolest part would be a large perch near my desk with a peach parrot that says “welcome to ‘company name’”. The door could be propped open with a welcome mat outside. The employees could be allowed a spontaneous 20 minute nap a day and a different snack each day for their hard work. Menu example: foot long hot dogs one day, cookies and beverage another day, ice cream sundaes another day and the list goes on. If this or some of these ideas were implemented we would have a stress free workplace resulting in better attendance, performance and increased revenue. Just a thought
And here’s HR’s responce:
I didn’t route this to a business unit for response since it seemed more of a Girls Just Wanna Have Fun submission. I was amused by the recommendations but concerned that possibly a very stressful event had prompted you to send this as a way to relieve some of the stress. The environment you describe would indeed be utopia and if such a workplace exists, they’re obviously keeping it a secret to prevent the world from applying. Hope things are going well for you today and you might take some solace in the fact that you don’t have cold, miserable rain such as we’re having here in the Midwest.
Comment on this rant here: May I make a suggestion?

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