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| Keepage |
The opposite of garbage. |
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| Key Learnings |
An annoying variation of "lessons
learned." The recap at the end of a project of what worked and didn't
worked. Intended to prevent future teams from making the same mistakes
-- but they do anyway. |
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| Keyboard Dyslexia |
Typing all the correct letters, just
in the wrong sequence. Occurs most often when "dashing off" an e-mail
response. |
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| Keyboard Plaque |
The disgusting buildup of dirt and
crud found on computer keyboards. |
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| Knowledge Transfer |
To share one's unique knowledge on
a subject or how something is done either by teaching or passing
along documentation. Today's companies attempt to preserve that
wisdom by using "knowledge databases" before it "transfers" with
departing employees. |
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| Krudzu |
Any proliferating management fad
-- or simply dumb concept -- that overtakes and eventually strangles
a company or organization. (Pssst! Just like the artificial plant
in the Sonic the Hedgehog comics.) |
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| Kudo Loop |
The seemingly endless e-mail loop
that occurs when everyone in the office feels they must add their
2 cents to a "Great Job!" company-wide e-mail from the boss. |
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| Lateral Arabesque |
To transfer laterally within a company
to a different but equal job. |
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| Lateraled |
To be moved sideways. As in: "I hear
you got a big promotion." "No, I got lateraled." |
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| Leadager |
A person in charge who confuses leadership
with micromanagement. |
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| Level Set |
A nice corporate-sounding term bandied
around in meetings that simply means "get everyone on the same page." |
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| Living Assets |
Employees. Also referred to as "live
assets," "human capital," "resources" and "carbon units." |
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| Living Document |
A document intended to be kept current
through continuous revisions and updates. Of course, after six months
everyone is sick of it and it sits ignored and unread on a server
somewhere. |
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| Long Pole |
From 'long pole in the tent,' the
person or group most behind schedule, thus holding up the entire
program. |
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| Loop Mail |
The ever increasing amount of e-mail
CCed or copied to you to "keep you in the loop." Most of it is unnecessary,
irrelevant and a major reason why you can't get your own work done. |
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| Lose the bubble |
To lose focus. |
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| M&Ms |
Entry-level employees fresh out of
college who fancy themselves "management material.” Their candy-coated
degree looks great, but inside they melt in the heat of real work. |
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| Malicious Obedience |
Opposite of civil disobedience. A
quiet protest of company policy in which employees go through the
motions of doing their jobs but intentionally accomplish nothing. |
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| Management Insultancy |
When corporate management hires a
team of outside consultants to do what it should be doing -- deciding
how best to run the company! |
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| Marginalienation |
Cryptic comments scribbled in the
margins of a document that leave you questioning the author's sense
of reality. |
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| Meatloaf |
Unsolicited mass e-mail, circulated
by friends or office mates via group e-mail lists, consisting of
jokes, anecdotes and other trivia. Where spam is commercial, meatloaf
is homemade. |
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| Meeting Moth |
meeting moth: An executive who flits
from meeting to meeting, but seldom acts on the items discussed
in them. |
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| Meeting Prep |
The pre-meeting ritual of going to
the restroom and getting a cup of coffee. |
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| Meta Ignorance |
Not knowing what you don't know.
"At least I have a clue about what I don't know, but my boss suffers
from meta ignorance." |
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| Meta-Decision |
An all-encompassing, comprehensive
decision based on the outcomes of several smaller decisions. "Once
all of the smaller issues are resolved, we'll render a final go/no
go meta-decision." |
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| Microwaiting |
The time spent in front of the employee
break room microwave while your lunch heats up. Regularly occurs
a few minutes before noon and is generally not reported as a part
of the lunch hour. |
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| Mission-Critical |
Another sign that too many people
in today’s business world have read too many Tom Clancy books. What’s
wrong with the word "essential"? |
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| Misunderestimate |
To seriously underestimate. Like
many Bushisms (a term or phrase mangled by the president), misunderestimate
is widely used (abused). |
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| Mouse Milk |
Anything that delivers little (or
at least hard to measure) payoff -- while often requiring lots of
hard work. |
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| Mouse Potato |
A person who spends hour upon hour
staring into his/her computer screen. Increasingly couch potatoes
are giving way to mouse potatoes. The TV Generation is losing to
the Digital Generation. BuzzWhack’s not sure this is really an improvement. |
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| Mousing Surface |
A term for those who feel "mouse
pad" lacks cachet. |
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| Multi-Slacking |
The act (or art) of performing multiple
non-productive tasks at once. The best multi-slackers simultaneously
can talk on the phone, surf the Web and watch TV. |
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| Nerdistan |
Any neighborhood or community where
a disproportionate number of residents work in high-tech industries.
These residents also tend to have a disproportionate number of electrical
outlets and phone jacks in their homes, too. |
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| New Guy Gene |
The internal mechanism that triggers
extra politeness in new employees until they're up-to-speed on office
politics. Example: "The new guy is so rude. He just busted in on
my conversation without a second thought. He totally lacks the new-guy
gene. |
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| Non-Concur |
Bureaucratic word choice that allows
one to avoid uttering something as definitive as "disagree." The
ultimate obfuscation: "Yes, I do not non-concur." |
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| Offline |
Primarily, it’s wherever you are
when you’re not on the Internet. But now it has become an office
catch phrase heard frequently in meeting. "That's a great idea,
but let's deal with that offline after the meeting." |
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| Ohno-Second |
The fraction of time (slightly longer
than a nanosecond) that it takes to recognize you've just goofed.
The perfect example is that moment of horror when your eye spots
the key in the ignition as the car door is being slammed shut. |
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| Open-Air Conference
Room |
An area outside the building where
employees convene to discuss business while grabbing a quick smoke.
"Let's have this meeting in my open-air conference room." |
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| Operationalize |
A weighty-sounding buzz term preferred
by consultants that simply means "put into action" or implement.
"The next phase is to operationalize our strategy." |
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| OT-mail |
An unnecessary, after-hours e-mail
sent to a supervisor or co-workers with the sole purpose of time-stamping
how late you worked.. Example: An e-mail sent to boss at 9:24 p.m.
-- "Just wanted to touch base on the Johnson account. Let me know
when we can m |
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| Out of Runway |
The point when you realize that no
matter how hard you work it'll be impossible to meet an approaching
deadline. "We're just about out of runway. If we don't get those
reports today, we'll never make next week's launch." |
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